Funny Quotes post for you, Funny Quotes Status For Friend or Friendship, Crazy Quotes Image which you can also share with your friend in social media.
Best Short Funny Quotes For Instagram & Facebook, every one using social media platform and all people share our photo video, status in these platform, if you are in good mood you can also share these one line funny quotes with your friend, these quotes make your friend laugh and also gives happiness in mind.
50+ Best Funny Quotes in English ( 2 Line Funny Status )
Best Funny 2 Line Quotes in English
- Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
- One advantage of talking to yourself is that you know at least somebody’s listening.
- If you love something, let it go. If it doesn’t come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
- As you get older, three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.
- The answer you’re looking for is inside of you, but it’s wrong. ( Best Funny Quotes )
- I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.
- I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.
- The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize.
- Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
- I’m not a complete idiot. Some pieces are missing.
Short Funny Shayari in English
- If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.
- I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.
- If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else.
- Save water and shower together. ( Short Funny Quotes )
- Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.
- I finally realized that people are prisoners of their phones… that’s why it’s called a “cell” phone.
- I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.
- People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
- Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
- You cry, I cry, …you laugh, I laugh…you jump off a cliff I laugh even harder.
Best Funny Quotes in English For Girl
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock. ( Funny Quotes )
There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.
Funny Quotes Make you Laugh –
People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
I don’t have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem.
I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.
Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.
Top Funny Shayari in English
- The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Never judge someone until you walk a mile in their shoes. By that time, they’ll be a mile away and barefoot.
- Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are.
- Sorry for the mean, awful, accurate things I said.
- Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.
- All guys hate the words DON’T and STOP unless they’re put together.
- I’m not shy, I’m holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.
- Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society. ( Funny Quotes in English )
- Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.
- I wish my book of life was written in pencil … There are a few pages I would like to erase.
- Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
- A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
2 Line Funny Shayari For Instagram
- An apple a day keeps the doctor away, But if the doctor is cute forget the fruit.
- Life is short, smile while you still have teeth.
- Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
- Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.
- High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead. ( 2 Line Best Funny Quotes )
- I am not lazy, I am on energy saving mode.
- The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
- Everybody wishes they could go to heaven but no one wants to die.
- I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.
- If two wrongs don’t make a right, try three.
- The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.
- Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday
- Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you’re done.
- Practice makes perfect but then nobody is perfect so what’s the point of practicing?
- Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.
- If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one.
- Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.
- Never argue with an idiot they’ll drag you down to their level and beat you through experience.
- Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can’t see.